(30 minutes later)
I have to learn how to type faster. There's a lot of things I have to learn how to do faster. I just realized I've been sitting on a dirty diaper (in my bed). Didn't get any "poop" anywhere, but it wouldn't have mattered anyways. I still wouldn't have washed my bedding. I went 4 days without washing my hair.
Something easier than expected is bringing him out in public. He just sleeps the whole time, and he loves car rides. This makes life a lot easier.
I have the feeling that sometime in the next 2 weeks or so, he'll give me like 4-5 hours at night to sleep. Probably just once or twice at first, but I'm looking forward to it. He's already 10 lbs 9 oz, and I read somewhere that they're able to sleep longer at night somewhere between 11 and 15 lbs, because they don't get as desperately hungry as fast. In the meantime, I'm going to cluster feed this baby ;)
I packed all of his newborn clothing up 2 days ago. I had no idea I would be so sad about it.
Side note: I have no idea why women have babies to get more money from welfare. Just getting a damn job would be a lot easier.
I know all moms say this kind of shit too, but Noah is doing a very good job learning about the world around him. The doctor commented that he was already able to see things at least 4 feet away. We've been doing a lot of tummy time, too. He's a strong little boy.
He poops at least every 30 minutes, though, so its no wonder that he developed a crazy diaper rash. My poor baby was in tears all afternoon on Saturday, but we were able to get an appointment for Sunday morning to get prescription cream for it. He hasn't cried in pain since, but I'm not entirely sure that the cream is working very well. Occasionally I'm still wiping some blood off his tush. We'll see in a few more days.
As for me, I'm overwhelmed but happy. My recovery and weight loss has been coming along well, and I finally feel like I'm doing something purposeful with my life. It's insane to think that I am responsible for this young life. This baby has made no mistake in his life, and he hasn't been led down any undesirable path. He's not been hurt by anyone, and he hasn't caused another pain. Having a child is like being given another chance. Noah is my do-over in life. There's not too much in my life I would have ever changed, but I can guarantee he'll be more athletic, and if he goes to college, hopefully he chooses his major more wisely ;)
No pressure, Noah. Whatever you choose to do, I'll always be proud of my little baby boy.
2 comments:
Kristin, I know I've explained how much I loved your honesty over the years...
I just think that you're going to be a wonderful mother BECAUSE of it.
I'm so glad that you're focused on not only how important Noah is and how things change when he's around, but also, yourself. I love that you're concerned about taking care of yourself too... (Besides the hair, but really, who needs to wash their hair? :))
Thanks, Jenn! I like to think that I'm pretty honest with myself with EVERYTHING in my life, even if it hurts. I think its working for me- I've never felt so fulfilled in my life. :)
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